Well, I'm almost at the halfway point of second year law. What can I say?! This year has been super hard...in terms of being away from home that is. There is a heavier workload but that's expected so I'm not too concerned about the amount of work to do. I'm just finding it harder to settle in this year. I don't know...it's a combination of things.
Over the summer, one of the girls living in this house threatened myself and the other girl and that kind of "set the scene" unfortunately for the kind of dynamic that's in this house. Which is kind of sad on her behalf cause I'm here for school...and well, frankly I wouldn't be seeing her after school was finished anyways. So the fact that she burnt the friendship bridge with myself and the other girl living here, well that's her own fault. And while she seems to think there is still tension, myself and D are carrying out our lives as regular law students, trying to forget that anything even happened. Why let it control our lives? But it did put a damper about the excitement of moving into this place. Oh well...next year here will be better (Provided M moves out) haha!
As for school...well, because I don't feel settled I feel like I'm missing something. Like there is an element to my studies that isn't there and I can't figure out what it is. There is nothing more that I can do..I'm working twice as hard as I did last year (if that's even possible) and still there is a strange feeling about the work that I am doing. I wish that I could put my finger on it or at least do something to remove this feeling, but I think that's going to be my challenge for this year. I just have to remain calm and not let the amount of work that I'm doing, or have to do, break me down. I'm almost at the boiling point, but I don't want to allow myself to break down or I'll have a really hard time picking up the pieces.
I'm missing S so much. It was super hard to leave him, and I was in tears the entire time I was waiting for my flight over here. While I'm here I feel down that I don't have him by my side each night...there are times when I could just use his arms around me and I don't have them here. It's definitely trying...but our love is stronger than any distance and by being in school I'm working on something that will better our future. My career will help contribute to the life that we want together. (yes, I am STILL waiting for him to pop the question...hahaha) I'm trying to be patient on that fact, but it's hard when you're faced with tonnes of people around you getting engaged and it's like "hello, I know that this is the right step for us...so that's the hold up?!" haha Why don't guys ever get it?! No matter how much you explain something to them, somehow the whole things remains a mystery to them!? HOW?!
Anyways, now that Wednesday's are lecture free I've created a to do list for myself to get done for this week. I am aiming to finish it by tomorrow so I should probably crack on right now. I am hoping that now I have book marked this page that I will be on here a bit more frequently. I know I've said it in the past that I will write on here more, but I'm going to make certain that I do. It's a good release of all the things that are in my head and I need to sort out, but can't really sort out in an orderly fashion in a conversation with someone else. :P
Needless to say, my blog will be on my weekly to do list! And it will get done (apart from a couple weeks over the Christmas break when I won't have access to the internet)
Anywho...off I go, to tackle this mountain of a list! Until next week....
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